Obsessed with success

By Neo Shi Wei and Leila Lai

PAPER CHASE: Academic success is not the key to everything you should achieve in life.
(GRAPHIC: MINH NGUYEN)

Earlier last month, I was heartened to see the Ministry of Education acknowledge Singaporeans’ obsession with certificates and degrees, as evidenced by Acting Education Minister (Higher Education and Skills) Ong Ye Kung’s speech at a conference on higher education. He said that we should not focus solely on pursuing further education for the sake of the degree, and education should include other measures of ability, such as industry experience.

On the subject of learning outside the classroom, I also would like to point out that we need to strengthen our communication skills, an aspect of personal development that I see neglected in favour of grades in university.

Ever since I entered NTU four months ago, I have heard this phrase repeatedly, in response to invitations to hang out: “I can’t. I have to study.” It did not bother me at first, since it does take a while to adjust to the demands of the university schedule and workload.

But when such behaviour is fueled by our obsession with grades, at the expense of developing other skills and building new or existing relationships with our loved ones, it becomes disturbing.

Some of my friends cringe at the thought of spending time away from their books. I used to think that freshman year would be a honeymoon year, when students can take it easy before more challenging and time- consuming modules overwhelm their schedules in later years. However, as freshmen, we are often reminded that we need to do well in our first year because it is easier to maintain a high grade point average (GPA) than to build upon a low one.

The drive for academic excellence, which I witnessed in batch mates and seniors alike, quickly banished from my mind the idea of a relaxed first year in university.

Other classmates still make time to cultivate friendships, but focus on peers who can give them academic benefits. Old friends are easily abandoned or forgotten if a grade is at stake and they want a smarter student in their project group.

However, according to a theory I picked up from one of my NTU modules, abandoning old friends is actually detrimental to their long- term success, even if their group project earns an ‘A’ this time.

Called “the strength of weak ties”, the theory posits that a wide network of friends, both close and less intimate ones, gives us access to more contacts and is linked to future career success. So when a student abandons his friends for peers who can help boost his grades, he not only hurts his friends, but also eventually does himself a disservice.

Personally, I believe that we should strike a balance between studies and other activities. If we are worried that spending less time on our studies will hurt our chances at success, we should remember that collaborative skills are also essential in the workforce, and are best developed through our interactions with others.

Adaptability and problem-solving are soft skills that can be honed not only through working on group projects, but also in planning recreational activities with friends and family.

My friends and I set aside time earlier this year to plan a trip to Europe, even though some in our group were in the middle of their university exam period.

Through the stress of planning and juggling multiple deadlines, we learnt about one another’s personalities and interests. We also picked up several effective negotiation techniques. When we had to choose which attractions to visit during our short holiday, we faced disagreements and often had differing viewpoints.

Finding a satisfactory solution taught us skills of collaboration and conflict resolution, practical tools that will continue to be useful to us both in university and the working world. But just as importantly, we learnt to put aside our differences and were able to enjoy our vacation without trouble.

At the end of the day, grades do not define who we are. They can even give rise to a ruthless pursuit of recognition, causing us to push aside the people who matter the most, for the sake of a few more points.

When one looks back on life, no amount of money can make up for time we spent striving for success, at the expense of relationships with our loved ones. A life rich in experiences and strong bonds of friendship will be far more rewarding than one focused on personal achievement and monetary reward.

After all, success is pointless if there is no one left to celebrate it with us.