The definition of family

Photos and text by Corin Too Jia Hui

My mother’s favourite pastime is to watch “I Am A Singer”, a Chinese singing competition. She spends most of her Sundays, her only day off, catching up on the episodes. “Some of the contestants’ stories are really touching and sometimes I’ll cry. Especially when I can understand what they are going through,” said my mother.

My mother, Joan Lee, 51, and my father, Alex Too, 52, are not on talking terms.

Although they are still married, their relationship is strained.

My father only comes home twice a week and when he does, he sleeps in the living room as I share a room with my mother.

This is the only time I get to see my father and mother together. However, my father usually only drops by for dinner and to check in on my grandparents before leaving. This is also when my mother starts to clean the house.

My mother has thought of leaving the family many times, but she has stayed on for me and my sister.

While my father provides financial support, they have not been able to support each other emotionally.

Because of that, my mother is having a hard time.

She has to work, do the household chores and to top it all off, the responsibility of caring for my maternal grandparents also fell on her.

My mother makes about $1,200 every month and even with my sister’s contribution to the family income, my father still remains the main breadwinner who foots all the bills. Because he does not come home often, he needs to go through a large stack of letters and bills when he does.

Having to juggle all these obligations without the help of my father is wearing her thin.

This photo essay depicts some typical scenes in my home.

The definition of family differs for everyone but for my mother, this is it.